The Pointes

Character descriptions from an illustrated book.

Just east of  Detroit, lies a phony Camelot made up of five communities known as The Pointes. Their residents include trust fund leeches, estranged, substance addicted offspring, and lecherous “sailors.”  Here is a small illustrated rogues gallery depicting some of the people one might meet strolling through the Village, the Park, the Farms, the Shores or the Woods of The Pointes.



Bernard “The Blazer Boy” / Bernard goes to private school. An academy at which one wears a “uniform.” Later, when Bernard embezzles funds as CEO of  his great-grandfather’s corporation, he will wear a different uniform and, work in the laundry.

Brooke “The Junkie”  / Brooke started popping pills in the 9th grade and stopped talking to her parents at the same time. After a stint at an exclusive rehab center out of state, commonly used by other Pointes parents, she returned home and took up drinking and smoking.

Mrs. Carleson “The Crone” /  Mrs. Carleson strolls the sidewalks of The Pointes with her weepy eyed pure bred dog. She glares at the world as her pooch shits anywhere it wants, preferring others’ lawns. She never has a clean up bag. She does however have her dead husband’s wristwatch, which she has worn since he committed suicide.

“Lacrosse” Lawrence / Lawrence, or Larry, or “Big Lare” plays lacrosse. He’s a senior in high school and the captain of his team. The boy is blessed with rugged good looks, a disarming smile, and the ability to cheat academically without detection.  With a full ride athletic scholarship, he’s off to an East Coast University where, he will rape his dates.

“The Squatter” / If you happen to venture into a bagel or coffee shop in The Pointes you may run into this nameless character. He ties his dog to a bench outside, purchases little or nothing, and then uses every outlet available in the place to construct his kingdom of portable electronic devices. He then talks on his phone, visibly perturbed when he has to raise his voice in order to overcome the indigenous sounds of the establishment.

Theresa “The Snoot” / Theresa comes from money. That money attracted a man who sired two brats and doesn’t love her. She fills her days with meaningless community club events and an occasional shift as salesperson at Talbots because people “listen to her there.” She keeps vodka in her garden hose.